Some Failed Apocalyptic Predictions to start 2012 off right.

Posted January 3, 2012 by Johnny2x in Science

Can I start off by saying some of the more recent predictions are the most frustrating. Only because the people are still alive and no one is following them around all day saying “Told you so, told you so” over and over again while they go about their day taking advantage of the more weaker minded people.

Being that it is 2012 officially now (I know this because no one in my neighborhood had any 1/4 sticks of dynamite left after Saturday night) I think it is time for a post about failed predictions. I am only choosing the best, or at least the ones that showed up first when I did a google search.

I could do a top 1000 with all of the predictions that have come and gone in the history of man but you are busy, important people.  (In no particular order, not even by date)

December 21st 2012 The Mayan Calendar

I guess we will be hearing about this one all year. I mean for the past 10 years I have seen at least 100 documentaries on the subject, every single one of them simply ignoring the fact that experts on the Mayan culture all say NO.

“There’s no real prophesy that says this is going to be the end of the world,” said Christopher Powell, an archeologist who studies Mayan culture, “not from the Mayan ruins, anyway.”

But once again people ignore the facts and just buy into the sensationalism of it all. It is a lot more fun to believe the fantasy rather than the truth that the calendar they made just ends.

Think of it this way:

You are sitting in your cubical on new years eve at your company’s holiday party. You might feel weird sitting there so much later then normal and a whole lot more intoxicated then normal…slightly.

Your cute little kitten calendar is staring at you and you realize “oh shit…gotta get a new calendar because this is not a 2012 calendar as well.”  You take it off the wall then hang up your brand new puppy calendar you got from your work pollyanna. The world didn’t end, just the calendar so you start a new one.

That date is simply the end of the Mayan’s “long count”. Then it starts over.  According to the ancient Mayan calendar, next year’s winter solstice marks the end of a 144,000-day cycle. This cycle, which begins at the mythical Maya creation date, has already been repeated 12 times. The 13th will end in 2012, capping a full 5,200-year Mayan cycle of creation.

Sorry it is such a boring ending to a great story.

I have another post focused on just the Apocalyptic scenarios that are specifically related to this date.

The Prophet Hen of Leeds, 1806

In Leeds, England in 1806 a hen began laying eggs with the phrase “Christ is coming” on each one.Eventually it was discovered to be a hoax. The hoaxer had written on the eggs in acid which etched the eggs. He then reinserted the eggs into the hen.

It was a stretch to believe that God would let us know the end was near by having a hen lay an egg with his message. Of course people still believe even today that Jesus’ face shows up in everything from toast to a sock.

If this one happened today I am sure people would buy it, PETA however would definitely frown on someone shoving an egg back into the bird.

Taiwanese Cult Leader Says God Will Arrive in Spaceship

Hon-Ming Chen who was originally an atheist and a professor, started a cult called “The True Way” (Chen Tao).

Chen believed the Universe was 4.5 trillion years old and had been created by a nuclear war. He also believed there had been five tribulations in the past which were survived by UFOs rescuing Earth’s inhabitants each time.

He predicted that God would show himself on cable television in North America (sorry antenna owners, guess you would have had to go to a neighbor’s house to watch) at midnight on March 31, 1998. Right after Friends.

After God’s television appearance, he was going to return to Earth is his spaceship. To prepare for this, his followers (140 of them) moved to Garland, Texas because it sounded like “God Land”. They bought about twenty homes and started wearing cowboy hats.

When God failed to appear (apparently he can’t even afford a TV spot in primetime) Chen offered to have his people crucify or stone him. That didn’t happen either.

Large Hadron Collider Potentially Creates a Black Hole

Ugh, one of the more frustrating ones. CERN is not dangerous. No matter how many videos are posted about it, the dangers of it creating a black hole that would grown and devour the Earth are a big fat 0.

This one frustrates me because  it is one of those stories where someone who doesn’t know much on the subject says something can happen, then someone who is an expert says, without a doubt,  this can not happen…and people still believe it. Maybe because the truth is boring sometimes so it is more fun to ignore the plain truth and stand around the water cooler talking about how an event like this could happen.

The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) is the world’s largest and highest-energyparticle accelerator. It was built by the European Organization for Nuclear Research (CERN) over a ten year period from 1998 to 2008, with the aim of allowing physicists to test the predictions of different theories of particle physics and high-energy physics, and particularly for the existence of the hypothesized Higgs boson[1] and of the large family of new particles predicted by supersymmetry.[2] The LHC is expected to address some of the most fundamental questions of physics, advancing the understanding of the deepest laws of nature. It contains six detectors each designed for specific kinds of exploration.

Isn’t the real truth about the experiments they are doing there enough to talk about? Or is it all so “blah, blah, blah” to someone uninterested in science that they would rather believe these experiments could destroy the world in a very Roland Emmerich kinda way?



Londoners Flee Their Homes In The Second Great Flood

Johannes Stoeffler, predicted in 1499 that the world would be flooded again because all six of the planets known then would be in conjunction in the constellation of Pisces.

Why does everyone want to see London under water? It happens in all the disaster movies.

Lot’s of people believed this one and as English astrologers set the date for February 1, 1524 over 20,000 people fled their homes.

Boat sales were off the charts.

Guess what? It didn’t happen.


Blah blah blah…blah blah blah blah…blah.

Smart people say “don’t worry nothing will happen”. Dumb people said “oh yes it will!”

Smart People-1,225,735,873,272,836…Dumb People-0.*

*Not an official score.








This post will be growing, just don’t have the energy today.

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About the Author


John created the just because he cares about each and everyone of you. He likes science, technology, movies, and music. He also likes long walks in the park but only at night and in most dangerous park he can find AND he discovered the internet while playing in his back yard as a child. Some of this is true and some of it is not.


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