Old School Medical Practices
Check out some of these Insane Medical Practices in History from cracked.com
#1 Wanna stop that baby from crying!? This one hits close to home with me. We just had our first child. When she cries it is a horrible feeling especially when she can not be soothed. We have heard of a lot of “home remedies” and have even tried some things like gripe water for colic.
Nothing even close to what it appears they used to do. Lucky babies!
To aide the stressed 19th-century mother, a series of “soothing syrups,” lozenges and powders were created, all which were carefully formulated to ensure they were safe for use by those most vulnerable members of the family. Oh, no, wait. Actually, they pumped each bottle full of as many narcotics as it could hold.
Heroin, by the way, was originally developed by Bayer. You know, those friendly folks behind harmless old aspirin.Oh, and while we’re taking on the man, we should also mention that Bayer used to be called IG Farben, a pharmaceutical and chemical conglomerate that allegedly sponsored experiments by Nazi torturers. How is this not at the center of every single Tylenol ad campaign: the fast acting pain reliever that has never sponsored Nazi torture camps.
#3 I need Trepanation like I need a hole in my head, oh wait..same thing
Historically trepanation was most commonly used as treatment for seizures and migraines. Surprise, surprise. Having a gaping hole drilled in your skull (usually without anesthesia) did very little to help people’s headaches or brain issues. Trepanation was also used as an extreme form of cosmetic/experimental body modification amongst several societies such as the Incans and Mayans. These societies also got largely wiped out, then a few hundred years later suffered the indignity of having an insulting Mel Gibson movie made about them, so it didn’t really work out that well.
#4 Cure Female Hysteria!
The suggested cure was just a genius idea from the doctors back then. Send your wife in and I’ll finger bang her till she calms down.
Yes that’s right, the cure for female hysteria was a doctor’s hand down your bloomers until you weren’t only thinking of England but screaming its name. Is it any wonder the list of symptoms for female hysteria was so long, literally any ailment could fit the diagnosis? In those sexually repressed times visiting the doctor’s office must have been like a trip to Disneyland for most women.
I know it’s weird to have a list with just 4 items on it, you can see the full list here at cracked.com